Wednesday, June 13, 2012

the cat ate my birth plan

I'm the kind of person who likes to plan and organise. I like to be prepared. Not that I go to pieces if my plans fall through or things don't quite go to plan, it's just that I like to think I'm ready. It gives me a small sense of achievement if something I organise pays off. A well packed bag, a thought out route, a well laid garden bed.

Often things don't go to plan. This is the nature of motherhood. Being ready to leave for work on time and stopping to enjoy life for a few extra moments, like the rainbow the Bright Spark and I stopped to look at the other day instead of getting him into the Husbands car for the daycare drop off. The Husband subsequently ran a little late for work. Actually as it wasn't my plans that were thwarted, maybe that doesn't count.

Birth is not something that can really be planned for. I feel prepared. Kind of. Didn't actually make it to an Active Birth class, but I read the book. I understand the basic physiology of labour. I'm drinking raspberry leaf tea. I can count the minutes between contractions. I did some reading up on new born baby care. That did make me think twice about the whole having an infant thing. But then the Husband pointed out it was a little late to reneg on that decision and I'd better get used to the idea of sleep disturbance and sore nipples pretty quickly based on the size of my belly.

Despite not being able to plan for birth, I think having a birth plan is part of the preparation for labour. For me it's about clear communication of the type of birth I'm hoping for, a natural labour. Last week I finally put a birth plan down on paper. More a birth philosophy really. Let me stay upright, encourage me. Don't offer me drugs, I'll ask for them if I need them. That sort of thing. Also things like let my son have skin to skin contact with me and breastfeed early. It's what I'd like to happen if all goes well and there is no reason for these things not to happen.

I also put in things like "show me the placenta". I'm a biologist by nature and I have a slight academic curiosity about the placenta. I'd just like to see it. Not eat it or bury it under a fruit tree. Just want to have a bit of a look at the marvellous organ that has kept my son alive all these months. I didn't even think about it with the Bright Spark until it was too late, so this time it's in the birth plan.

I also included some affirmations and some visualisations. Stuff like "contractions are pain with reason" and "imagine you are swimming with dolphins". A little new age-y, a little bit Earth mother-ish, but stuff that might work. My mother claims that doing affirmations before a university exam got her enabled her to excel at the exam. It was the only time her exam mark was better than her course percentage. And why not think about swimming with dolphins when in the throws of a contraction if it helps to release endorphins and keep me away from an epidural. I'll give it a try.

The other thing I'm doing differently of course, is going to term, which changes the management of labour and gives me more freedom because if things are going well I shouldn't need continuous monitoring and I'll be able to be out of bed, bounce on a birth ball, soak in a shower and move at will. Going to term is not something I can plan of course, but I have managed to this time, after the Bright Spark was born at 36 weeks.

So I typed my birth plan, affirmations and visualisations. I printed them onto coloured paper and even laminated the affirmations and visualisations so I an take them into the shower with me (that made me feel very organised). I folded up the copies neatly; green paper for us, yellow for the midwife on duty. I put them at the top of my open suitcase with some photos of the Bright Spark and some ultrasound printouts of the Unborn Unit. I was ready. A couple of days later I came into the room to find the copies on the floor. The cats had eaten my birth plan. Chunks had been taken out of my neat printouts and little bits of yellow and green confetti were scattered over the floor. This sort of thing you can't plan for really. So I printed them again and secured them inside a bag where they couldn't be tampered with by a bored feline.

So the birth plan is done, the bag is packed and I'm feeling as ready as I need to be. Which is good, because I've been sitting here on my birth ball for a few hours typing away and timing contractions. I'm not sure if this is strong pre-labour or early labour. If I'm lucky it's established labour and I get to be one of those people that walks into the hospital 8 cm dilated and laughing. It feels real this time and I think the Unborn Unit may become the Born Unit today.

The Bright Spark has joined me now and I feel like I need to spend some time with him before these contractions get on top of me. I'll finish this up before he finishes watching "Franklin and Friends" on the iPad and then maybe we can have our usual breakfast ritual together. I think his world is going to change forever today.

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